... who's haitian & who isn't.
pre•judge: verb → form a judgment on (an issue or person) prematurely and without having adequate information
22 09 09.
sometime i really try to be nice. not to hurt anybody… not that i say cute stuff, but i shut up. and i just stare at people and smile. so that no one finds things to be mad about. those moment are actually cool. everyone’s happy. but SOMETIMES also, SOME PEOPLE can’t seem to realize the importance of the moments when im « nice » and they start talking shit just to make me become normal again. well, so yesterday… while we were waiting for the PE teacher (because student wait for teachers when they’re late… and teachers kick students out for being late. i’m not complaining. it’s a fact. aint no democracy inside a school…and screw everyone who think there should be. they should all be crucified.) … yes so.. (when it comes to moving away from my point … i’m gifted.) uhu…i was saying… so we were waiting for the PE teacher. and i was nice… i was reading a book 😀 !!! and smilling and agreeing to everything the other girls would say… and the girl came. out of nowhere – (with that disgusting grin that she wears like a uniform… im starting to think her face is really like that. i hope not. that would be cruel from god.). she sat and started thinking… and apparently, the conclusion to all this thinking was:
« Yael you’re not haitian.. you don’t look haitian. you don’t think haitian… and your skin…hum…«
wowowooo. relax duude!! i got so mad, i started started spreading all my haitian.history.knowledge (the least i kept from all those silly history classes – the same things they’ve been saying since for ever.)… but wait, seriously… what would « haitian » mean? a real haitian should be an indian. but since there were spanish people, african people, french people, english people… blah blah… a real HAITIAN would be a mix of all that. so i find it very very offending for her to just come and treat me as if she was the one responsible of deciding who’s haitian and who isn’t. (Oh no yael, that’s not what i meant… i mean that since you’re white…) WHITE?! …if i’m white… what color is Scarlett Johanson? im a bit lighter than you are… and i love my skin color cause it looks like caramel or cinnamon. there’s nothing no one can say to make me feel bad about that… (yes but you don’t think the same way as we do… – we. as in all the other girls agreeing to the bullshit she’s saying). she ended the discussion by saying « you won’t get it.«
why won’t i get it? because it’s a haitian thing?… i hate those comments. ot those situations… like when people see you & they start cursing in creole, thinking you won’t get it. & they laugh so hard. thinking they’re sooo funny. so im not haitian. han okay… i speak a raw creole with words she never even heard. i grew up in the hills, where i would play in the red mud, drink rain.water, go up the hill & collect potatoes, throw cow & horse shit that i would pick up with my HANDS… & im not haitian?… im « white« . ok. uhu. alright.
Can’t blame people for being stupid. they didnt ask for that, did they?
Track: [hunter – Dido]
painful thoughts. 